> Punography

> Punography
> *I changed my iPod name to Titanic. It’s syncing now.
> *I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
> *When chemists die, they barium.
> *Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
> *A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
> *I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
> *How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
> *I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
> *This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I’d never met herbivore.
> *I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.
> *I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
> *They told me I had type A blood, but it was a type-O.
> *A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
> *PMS jokes aren’t funny, period.
> *Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
> *Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory– I hope there’s no pop quiz.
> *The Energizer bunny arrested and charged with battery.
> *I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
> *Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils?
> *When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
> *What does a clock do when it’s hungry? It goes back four seconds.
> *I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!
> *Broken pencils are pointless.
> *What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
> *England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
> *I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
> *I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
> *All the toilets in New York’s police stations have been stolen. Police have nothing to go on.
> *I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
> *Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
> *Velcro – what a rip off!
> *Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.
> *Venison for dinner? Oh deer!
> *Earthquake in Washington obviously government’s fault.
> *I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.